Yep, I can log in.

Everyone has their own preferences, and even toddlers are too old for some people. It’s kind of shitty if someone just said outright that you’re too old, but bear in mind they were only speaking for themselves. You’ve still got plenty of other options.

In any case, welcome.

Well, I’m giving it a go. I got a book, It’s Not Fair by Eloise Rickman, a general intro to youthlib I thought was pretty good. I told my brother I thought he should read it, partly because I think he’ll generally be on board, but also because his older son (9 years old now) is a lot like me, and I worry about him having the same problems I did. I always hated how powerless adults made me feel, and I see my nephew doing the same thing. Felt pretty awkward, but he agreed with the assessment and appreciated the recommendation. So we’ll see what he has to say, I guess.

No, just a picture someone made. Phoenix Wright and Professor Layton characters as ponies.

If you’re up for it. Is the cost an issue?

If you or anyone else has any advice on how to deal with the shame, it would be most welcome.

A lot of people say just being in the community is helpful. Being around people who understand how you feel and being able to talk about it openly go a long way toward making it feel normal. That’s the best advice I’ve got, anyway.

What would you do if a mature 16 year old throws themselves at you?

16’s older than I go for, personally. But if I were into that… Yeah, I’d have some concerns for sure. I’d want to make sure she knew what she was getting into, to whatever extent I knew myself, and I’d certainly fret a lot about what might happen if anyone found out. But I’d probably go for it in the end.

I think my AAM identity came only after I was sexually assaulted (which did result in trauma), does that in any way change things about it, like what term I’m supposed to use?

Not really. If it came about because of trauma, you can call it traumagenic if you like, but that’s about it. You are the way you are, regardless of the reason.

Does that make him a MAP?

Based on that alone, I’d say no, but you’d have to ask him.

How do I make people understand I was capable and willing to consent?

Good luck. There seems to be no convincing people once they’ve made up their minds. I’ve never heard of anyone successfully doing so.

How old do you have to be to be considered a MAP?

There’s no minimum. If you’re still a kid and attracted to others the same age, you wouldn’t typically be considered a MAP unless that doesn’t change when you get older, but it’s possible you could know right away. I’ve heard people say they knew as young as 7 or 8.

When did you know?

I was about 13 or 14, I think. Found some… appealing (but legal!) pictures of kids on Usenet and realized right away they were way sexier than any adults.

Did you feel scared about the truth of your attraction? Or like you should change who you are even though you know you can’t?

Nope. I’m pretty lucky in that regard. It’s never bothered me at all.

would MAPs hesitate to engage or would you kinda jump on the opportunity or does that depend?

Depends a lot on the individual, but I think most of us would be pretty hesitant. The fear of getting caught is strong, and there are a lot of issues and ways for things to go wrong even if you don’t. Depends on their judgment of the AAM, too — how old they are, how well they can handle the stress, etc.

I went to mapsupport.de because it seems likely to be around for a while, but that’s mainly because its rules are fairly restrictive. It’s not like nnia, but it still may not be to your liking. There’s also Little Lounge; it doesn’t even have a domain name to lose, so it should be pretty secure. I don’t know if all the federation issues have been worked out, though.

Maybe kodo.pictures or cunnyfu.cc?

I don’t know. It seems to me that the only people who would actually donate are those who are well-meaning but misguided. It might be turning ignorance into money more than hate.

I knew a kid once who wanted to be a dentist. And now he is! He’s German, though, so I guess it’s not really the same.

You mentioned feeling guilty before, so I’m guessing you’re still struggling with self-acceptance? I think working on that is the most important thing. Self-control is easier when you’re comfortable with who you are and what you do. Trying to suppress or avoid thoughts and feelings just makes them more insistent.

But in the short term, maybe it’d be helpful to think of it like this. You wouldn’t do anything inappropriate when there are adults watching, right? Ten, twenty years on, those kids will remember. Even if there aren’t adults around in the present, they’re always watching from the future.

Yeah, I think the best thing to do about upsetting thoughts is learn to just move on. Don’t even tell yourself to stop thinking about it. Just drop it.

That’s not an easy thing to do at first, but if you know to do it, you can work on it. It might help to have a topic ready to go so you don’t have to come up with something else to think about on the spot, and maybe change it up sometimes so you don’t start to associate the two things. And it’s something you can actively practice; deliberately think about something unpleasant for just a moment and quickly move on to something else. It’s much easier when you’re prepared for it.

That’s just my experience, of course. No guarantee it works for everyone.

I think that would be a broader term, maybe a superset, maturity being a spectrum and adulthood a binary thing. There are lots of things that teenagers are seen as being too old for, but also, 17-year-olds are often infantilized in ways that 18-year-olds aren’t.

Intact children only!

Can’t really argue with someone whose only goal is to justify their bigotry, I guess.

If it’s meant for art, what about Pixelfed? Haven’t tried using it, but it’s a lot easier to browse than Pleroma.

Wonder if I could get away with buying one for my nephews…

I’m getting errors, too, even with files that have worked before. Something must have broken on the back end.

People thinking we’re not even real is weird. Maybe they assume we stick to .onion sites. I’ve never seen that in the Mastodon/Pleroma realm; people there just think we’re all grooming kids and trading CP.